Evergreen (Canceled World)

by The Delegation

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1.
I put a hand above your eye You’ll always know to make me cry I’ll always be — you’ll always know I wrote you such an endless poem Up on the bridge, and left it home I’ll always be — and you’ll never know I write you long, my always care And all the leaves stuck in your hair I’ll always be — you’ll always know The fireworks are hot and low You turn your head, your face aglow You’ll always know, you’ll always know You’ll always know, you’ll always know You always know I’ll follow you
2.
1. Summaries 2. But Not Accomplished What have I done but not secured? What have I done but wasn’t sure? What have I done but not accomplished? 3. Interlude 4. Canceled 5. Headlight Imprecise And maybe I’ll believe it I never wanted to be okay Something differently anemic Something better than not today Like a hindsight by electric By a headlight imprecise I repeat I never needed To have a handshake in your sights I’m conceited, I’m pathetic I can’t bother to be okay And I’d like to be kinetic I would have pleaded to be okay Disadvantageously eclectic I’m a lover and I’m afraid I’m attracted to antiseptic But I never wanted to be okay Smile broad what you’re allotted I never wanted to be okay Comatose and simple-hearted I never wanted to be okay
3.
See the teacher, and the liar to be And explaining, every minute to me Now it’s raining, with some points to concede And explaining, every minute to me All the things we’ll see, details to me All the things you’ll be, all the things you’ll be Blinding chalk-dust, falls subliminally Like the rest does, so diminutively Celebrating, while we’re waiting to be Separating and curating the sea All the things we’ll see, details to me All the things you’ll be, all the things you’ll be In a minute, in a minute to me
4.
5.
I never dreamed how far we’d go — The cups we’d crack, the songs we’d show. I’ll always be too resistible. The ashtray years, you leave a space; I hate to breathe or show my face. I’ll always be too resistible. The leaves are shriveled less each year; I listen more since there’s less to hear. I’ll always be too resistible. The single point such far from near; The roof glows used, punctured veneer. I’ll always be too resistible. I could watch you with my hands And make you grow like potted plants I guess I’ll never understand How to sit and not to stand. I’ll always be too resistible. I’ll always be so insistible. I might be so dismissable.
6.
1. were alone when we were alone when we were alone, you were my metronome, indefinite When we were alone, and ticking seconds could drone, indefinite, indefinite 2. Paintings and Movies And paintings and movies, eventually, have to decide All the things they vacuum, what they have to bleed, and they brush aside Come to be distraction, limping harmony, knowing it too well And never decide, and leave it from me, don’t decide at all Knowing that we were alone And he wants to be a perfect cylinder And he wants to be 3. Evergreen 4. Indefinitely / Tattoo Collage It comes back to him, incomparably The knowledge he’ll be, indefinitely So like a rag, each second alone He was in love, froze to the bone With idols to see, and looking like stone These images free are arrows we’ve thrown And tie it all in, or write it all down One day we will all forget how to frown Or it expressed what he couldn’t quite say Now it taunts like nighttimes we felt When he’s romantic and loose like the day Shaving endless ties from your belt ** In this grown world, those out of tune songs, Those full of gestures, tattoo collage And wood-chaired plays, parading their gall The only thing we say that we love And want to hold and want to be held There’s orange light that shines up the walls And if there’s nothing more to be ours I don’t know how I’ll think all alone They tell you how to sit on a stone Choose bad or less, you’re yes or you’re no I’d run forever, long as a goal And love you more, they leave me alone And when you’re finally out on your own No less a child than ever you’ve known Take off your shoes and write me a poem And love me like some day we’re alone Reflecting hard to look over the sand Wonder how often memories are wrong Explaining music, hot on the seams And love you more when we were alone
7.
The End 03:15
I’m used to cold with my head on the phone Reminding me of my time spent alone Outrageous dares, the skyscrapers such blown Away And precedents perch in a log by my head Complacents drive taxis through suburbs they dread These empty not cities are all that you’ve said We can make And us talking lightly of edges and hues You’d write about us and I’d write about you And I want to be different, defiantly blue Like we used to deny all the things that we knew Were fake ** The cold is bright like my time spent alone I guess you’re a woman, I guess that you’ve grown Naked to me, I’m not looking at them I’d love to chase you, run at you again Virtuosically seeking the end So moronically seeking the end I know you think you can find me an end I know you hope you can find me an end So afraid you won’t find me the end So afraid you won’t find me the end
8.
9.
You drew the windows in front of the walls Sometimes I love only things that they say Hold your notebook like it’s a baby Sometimes I love only things that they say And turning images into arrows I was a lover, needed each second alone I was a rag doll, froze to the bone You’re some white light and I’m far away
10.
1. Evergreen 2. Growing Old 3. Flow Like Wine And I feel fine Borderline Watch our lives — Our canceled (world). And I feel fine Borderline — flow like wine. Our canceled (world).
11.
I talk in undertones, I love the silent wars and all the strongest chords I needed for you, and Motion Picture, and all the table traps — play with their bootstraps, longing for you. I talk in bellows for want of heavy ropes; for want of telescopes I pointed at you; for want of contracts of no complacency; for all your faith in me; for nothing to do. I talk enamored — impossibility — with no ability to see what I do when princess father dies, when there’s no accord, I’m running overboard to see what I knew. I talk in certainties (I talk so softly) — these lights roll off me, can't get them to stay — and all these songs will fade eventually They’ll run their course with me, have nothing to say ** And they’re so beautiful, I look for reasons why these fever dreams and I are never okay.
12.
1. Summaries 2. Yellow Paint 3. Canceled What have I done but not accomplished? 4. Fine (I wrote you such an endless poem Up on the bridge, and left it home I’ll always be — and you’ll never know The fireworks are hot and low You turn your head, your face aglow You’ll always know, you’ll always know) ** (We were alone, indefinite Tattoo collage, the things we say) ** And I feel fine At the end of time Some waterline Just yours and mine Our canceled world Our canceled world And I feel fine Drunk on wine Following signs And off the line Misaligned With what I’ll find Our canceled world Our canceled world And I feel fine My alibi This broken sky Is smoking high You can rely On being mine You can rely On being mine Our canceled world Our canceled world

credits

released October 7, 2016

Gabriel Zucker — piano, compositions, lyrics, electronics, voice
Adam O’Farrill — trumpet
Eric Trudel — tenor saxophone
Jacob Teichroew — tenor saxophone, clarinet
Bryan Qu — tenor saxophone
Mark Chung — violin
Ron Lawrence — viola
Eric Allen — cello
Artemisz Polonyi — voice
Lorena del Mar Hernandez — voice
Bam Bam Rodriguez — bass
Gabriel Globus-Hoenich — drums
David Su — additional electronics

produced by Gabriel Zucker with Chris Connors
mixed by Chris Connors with Gabriel Zucker
mastered by Michael Fossenkemper

recorded 5-6 December 2014 at Brooklyn Record Studio (Brooklyn, NY), engineered by Bryce Goggin.
Movt. IX recorded 9 February 2015 at Sterling Social (Brooklyn, NY), engineered by Paul Loren.

album designed by Emile Klein
release managed by Garret H Morris

Evergreen (Canceled World) was made possible by a grant from the American Composers Forum with funds provided by the Jerome Foundation.

under exclusive license to ESP Disk Records LLC, 990 Bedford Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11205

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